100 Black Dates
First, thank you for making it this far.
Chances are, you met me and I gave you This card because I want to go on a date with you.
On this page, you will find everything you need to know to move forward with that.
At the bottom, you will find a form to ask me any unanswered questions you have, or to send me your information so we can set something up.
I’m truly Looking forward to connecting with you.
I’m confused! What is this?
100 Black Dates is a social experiment. It’s a love meditation&ritual. It’s an art project and performance piece. It’s a crash course in dating (because I don’t necessarily feel like I’m good at it and I’m not that experienced).
This began because I wanted to open myself up to the energy of love in my life. I wanted to broadcast to the universe that I am ready to break the generational curse of strong, single women that seems to run in my family. I know so many women who think that finding love is impossible, that good black men are hard to find, that black women have a harder time dating… I myself have fallen into these dangerous thought patterns at multiple points in my life. This is a way for me to debunk this myth, if only for myself. I hope that my writing about these experiences inspires and encourages other black women to put themselves out there, in their own way, and find a bit of hope themselves.
These dates are going to be turned into a series of zines (art books) containing film photographs, illustrations and writings. You all will be anonymous for the most part. I will write your first name and no one will be able to recognize you in the photo people see. It will be a zoomed in, cropped, close up of a feature of you that captures your vibe/energy, or maybe it will be a photo from behind, but it will not reveal you (unless I have your permission of course). This will not be about man bashing. I will not drag anyone. This will be an honest/vulnerable account of my experience with you as a person, but it will not be used for any kind of negativity.
Is this a real date?
I am treating it like one and I’d like you to do the same, so if you don’t think you would be interested in going on a date with me if this weren’t a project I was working on, then please do not reach out. I am choosing every person that receives this card with intention. I selected you because I was drawn to you. This is not random. I’m definitely doing this as a way to make a genuine connection. It’s my hope that even if we don’t make a love connection, I leave this experience with a beautiful friendship!
I intend for both of us to pay for ourselves (if you desire otherwise, I am open to talking about it), but regardless, my goal is to plan each date so that they are free or low cost.
Because I don’t know if it is possible to actually do this, so it allows me to have a difficult and fun goal to work towards. It also increases the odds. 100 dates can’t all be terrible right? *fingers crossed*
What if you really connect with someone?
I intend to be 100% transparent with every person I involve in this.
I intend to be emotionally and physically safe.
I intend to practice honest communication.
Because of this, I have a few rules:
I will be celibate during the duration of this experiment.
I will not be kissing anyone that I go on a date with while the project is happening.
I will not be in a relationship while participating in this project.
If I meet someone and we genuinely connect by number 10, or 30, or whatever, and there is a desire to be exclusive, I will exclusively date them and stop this project. I will stop communication/coordination of other meetings. I will let everyone know.